So I was browsing around reading the thoughts of some people online, when I came the site of a young lady who suffered, or didn't, a breakup, or reunion...I don't know.
You decide http://rookieblogger-randomthoughts.blogspot.com/2010/06/untitledmuch-like-my-love-life.html
Below is my comment to this young woman. I hope that it is uplifting. Every good and noble woman is worth so much. And she shouldn't rely on a man to show her that.
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You ought to consider holding him to his word and taking the time to focus on yourself and your needs. (MBA?)
He's clearly too wrapped up in his own needs to tend to yours. He's probably a fabulous guy, but he still may not be prepared for what you need. Fabulous guys don't always make fabulous partners.
But, you're back together now...that's great...but what does that really mean? How does it effect your decisions on a daily basis over a long distance? Do you avoid looking at other guys? Do start each sentence with "my boyfriend..."? Do you go to sleep each night pining wistfully while feeling the deep sense of incompleteness that only T can fill?
Being "in love" is a wonderful, sweet, and temporary sensation. But having love, being loved, being loving - these are investing in others without the expectation of entitlements and loving yourself with mercy. And these things are permanent and fulfilling, and won't have you wondering what you did wrong when an indecisive man accidentally, deliberately breaks up with you and then accidentally, deliberately gets back together with you.
I have read a few of your entries. I like your style of thought, and I think it's great that you have celebrated a 1 year blogaversary; but in the entries that I read, including this one, I don't see that you've over thought something before you've made a decision. Instead, you've mainly mulled over an outcome after someone else has made a decision for you.
i.e. "'T' isn't a guy who jumps to conclusions suddenly, he thinks things through very rationally. He didn't break up with me all of a sudden. He must have put a lot of thought into it. And I was the one who called him back looking for answers - what if I hadn't called? Would we still be broken up?" Um...yes you'd still be broken up...and as a guy I can tell you that he did want his space. He did want to break up, but he did NOT want to break your heart and hear you cry. And he made both decisions for you, first to break up, second to get back together.
Do you really want to go into the next phase of your relationship feeling like, "I wasn't good enough for him, wasn't supportive enough, or 'something-or-the-other' enough." Forgive him yes, but trust what your heart is saying to you.
Your man should love you, protect you, guide you knowing him, respect you, and be truthful to you; NOT leave you in limbo, skirt the issue, be mysterious, and change his word.
Heartache will be in store if you keep placing your heart in incapable hands. If you are serious about "finding undying love," then find a source of love that has always been and will never cease or fail to be. If you want "undying passion," find the a source of passion that gave rise to all emotion and was and is and will always be. Give your heart over to that kind of lover and be totally fulfilled.
Be courageous, and love yourself enough to settle for nothing less than the one who truly can satisfy all the needs you mention. But, sweetheart, you won't find that kind of relationship with any man on earth.
I have a feeling you are way more than just a girlfriend. Sometimes jerks come your way to help you figure this out.
Warm Regards.
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